by Amy Hautman Bates
Peacemaker, Sequoyah Trueblood visited SWC last week and referred to the need for women to moderate the aggressive nature of men. Honoring the feminine virtues of creating life, peace, sensitivity to Nature and the needs of others is the most obvious way to move toward a more sane world. Eisler, in her book The Chalice and the Blade describes the balanced, nurturing partnership society of Minoan Crete which made me hopeful that our current culture might be able to evolve in that direction. As we are exposed to more models for a peaceful, harmonious society, it is more likely to become a reality.
I grew up with five brothers who seemed aggressive, domineering, selfish, and more privileged than my sister and me. They seemed stronger physically and mentally. I was more sensitive in body and mind. Sensitive meant weak. The feminist movement of the 1970’s helped me put voice to sexism and my feelings of repression. I ended up more empowered, but a little ticked off– a little more warlike.
Then I gave birth to a son. We made great efforts to provide a gender-neutral environment and shield him from violent images like guns and television. Even though he lived in a gentle, nurturing place, in the same space as his sister, he was louder, faster, stronger and more aggressive. He growled and banged on things before he even spoke a word. I began to see, it is not their fault! Males are different. My husband, my father, my brothers, are not trying to be domineering, it is IN them. We need to express more feminine qualities for balance. Giving up resistance to that masculine nature in all of us, and being in a loving, nurturing place will help moderate the aggressive dimension of the psyche and our culture.